Day 18 Catching Myself When I'm Off

So my 30 day challenge has been quite an adventure so far.  Yesterday, I started my pattern of letting my commitments fall by the wayside but today I've recognized what I've started doing and I'm re-committing today.  The more awareness I'm building the quicker I'm able to catch myself when I'm off the path and re-connect to what I want for myself.  Here's a reminder of the commitments I've made for this first 30 day challenge:

Items to do Every Day (Non-negotiable):

1. Drink 24oz. of water every morning. (Body)
2. Study Body, Mind, Mastery by Dan Millman for 45 Mins. (Mind/Coaching)
3. Exercise for an hour (Body)
4. Work on Art Pieces for a minimum of 1 hour. (Artistic Expression)

Limits I want to put on myself (Non-negotiable):

1. Only 30 mins at a time at the computer.  A minimum of a 15 minute break until I can use the computer again.

There have been so many things I've been learning with this process...but, it doesn't necessarily feel like learning as much as it feels like remembering.  These lessons I have known all along yet making them practical (to practice-all) has been a wonderful journey and challenge...and it never ends.  

Reminding myself that this is a practice that will continue as long as I live is humbling, especially for a recovering perfectionist.  Moving from a striving for Perfection to a commitment to Mastery has been a great realization and one that I've been getting more and more comfortable with as part my default mindset.  "Neurons that fire together wire together" as my psychology professors would say.  

Reminders occur daily by studying Body, Mind, Mastery.  It's been very satisfying so far and at Day 18 I'm really seeing the benefits of this consistent action.

My 30 minutes has run up on my computer time (and past...grrrr) and the day is too nice to not fully enjoy it.  I'm really enjoying this limit on computer time but need to keep duct tape that my timer to it.  I'm going to do that now.  Have a great weekend!

Day 14 Check-in

What a Journey!

It's been so interesting to see what has been happening throughout this process.  Here's a reminder of what I've committed to...

Items to do Every Day (Non-negotiable):

1. Drink 24oz. of water every morning. (Body)
2. Study Body, Mind, Mastery by Dan Millman for 45 Mins. (Mind/Coaching)
3. Exercise for an hour (Body)
4. Work on Art Pieces for a minimum of 1 hour. (Artistic Expression)

Limits I want to put on myself (Non-negotiable):

1. Only 30 mins at a time at the computer.  A minimum of a 15 minute break until I can use the computer again.

First, I'd like to share some of the things I've noticed and then move on to a new exciting idea that I'd like to share with you.  By drinking 24 oz. of water every morning, I'm finding that my energy levels throughout the day are much more constant and at a higher level than if I don't.  In fact, if I miss my water in the morning, by 11am I start to feel sluggish.  Something that I'd always felt starting in high school at about this time.  Was I always dehydrated?  This is a fantastic habit I want to continue.

Exercising for an hour.  I've been playing small and counting even my walks with my dog as time spent exercising.  For the next 16 days I'm going to make the effort to step up the intensity of the exercise as I know I can handle more.  It's hard to know how the effects are here, but perhaps some of my high energy level has something to do with this.

Working on art pieces has been fun as it's enjoyable to spend time each day being abstract and creative that doesn't have anything to do with my direct work.  There's no more pining to express myself as I'm feeling fulfilled with the amount I'm doing.  Huge difference from when I had the desire and all my energy was wasted thinking about expressing myself instead of doing it.  I've been having fun using the old wax crayons from my grandfathers house and playing with melting them to create effects.  Here's a quick pic of one of my pieces in progress.

The computer is one of the harder places to regulate myself as I do a lot of work from the computer and find myself getting lost working on something.  The first week I carried a timer around and hit start every time I sat at a computer, it worked great and my house projects happened a lot more.  Also, I didn't notice a drastic decrease in productivity as well.  In fact, I had to be more focused when I did get to the computer so that I could get more done.  I must re-commit to the timer.  Perhaps I should tape it on.

There have been the low points, that I'm still addressing.  For example, I'm having trouble doing everything during weekends and when I'm around others all day.

The fun has been in trying to figure out solutions for myself and re-committing to the goals I've set.  Out of these struggles new ideas have come to the forefront.

These new ideas have sprung forth like geysers and old ideas have bubbled back up to the surface.  This time I'm doing a better job of capturing them and putting them into my notebooks and filing system so that I don't have to keep on re-thinking them over and over without making progress.

One of my most exciting ideas is directly applicable to this blog and involves bringing my personal development to another level wherein I'm able to not only serve myself but also put information out there and share my experiences with those interested.  Even if I only help a few people I feel as though I will have been of service and more satisfied than if I just did it for myself (also, it's a good motivator for me).  So what is this exciting idea you ask?  Having gone through the practice of reading a book consistently for the first 14 days, I've realized that every book shares a certain philosophy.  Thinking about a philosophy is one thing, but acting upon a philosophy is another thing all together.  My new idea is to focus on a book for 30 days and extract the key principles and ideas while at the same time putting those ideas into action.  During this time I will journal my experience through blogging.

My goal is to be able to transform these ideas into practical aspects that I can use in my life and at the same time share these big ideas and my experience of them.

I'm going to start with Body, Mind, Mastery by Dan Millman.  Stay tuned...

Six Days in...Philosophy in Action

Day 6 into the 30 day challenge.

Already, I have slacked :(

A quick reminder of the philosophy I am looking to put into action....

Items to do Every Day (Non-negotiable):

1. Drink 24oz. of water every morning. (Body)
2. Study Body, Mind, Mastery by Dan Millman for 45 Mins. (Mind/Coaching)
3. Exercise for an hour (Body)
4. Work on Art Pieces for a minimum of 1 hour. (Artistic Expression)

Limits I want to put on myself (Non-negotiable):

1. Only 30 mins at a time at the computer.  A minimum of a 15 minute break until I can use the computer again.

A strong start on day 1 and 2, completing all of my items.  During these first two days I noticed the most pronounced change occur with the limits that I put on my computer time.  The amount of practical things I got done skyrocketed.  All the tasks were quite enjoyable and partially because they are all things that I want to be doing.  Morale was great.

Weekend days 3 and 4 were a 30 day challenge disaster.  I spent the weekend traveling and coaching a roller derby tournament that my girlfriend was playing in.  We ended up winning the tournament but I missed my obligations.  I didn't work on any art or study my book.  The exercise I got was minimal as I wasn't actually playing myself.  The temperature had to be in the 90's and humid inside the rink though and I drank enough water to meet my goal 10 times over and I got a fantastic sweat on...so at least it was a good cleanse for the skin.  Computer was a non-issue as I didn't spend much time on it at all.

Reflection on days 3 and 4.  I need to be able to keep these tasks at the front of my mind every day.

NEW Strategy: Print out my tasks and paste them on my fridge and leave them on my desk so that every day I need to fill one out.

Let's see how this correction will help.

Day 5 was extremely busy as I was catching up on all the work I didn't do over the weekend and had a number of meetings to attend and Floorball to run. The bad habits from the weekend seeped into my first day of the week.  I'm hoping the new strategy will help with this.

Day 6 is today and I'm back on the train.  Whenever you fall out of your commitment you have 2 choices.  Re-commit or Quit.  I choose to Re-commit.  Which reminds me of one of the songs that another derby league had for their intro this weekend....2 Legit, 2 Legit to Quit.

I'll let you know how the new strategy goes and heres some of the artwork that I created in the last 4 days....

Onward and upward!

Philosophy in Action Round 1

Time to start the experiment of building some Fundamentals as this is what Philosophy in Action is all about.

First things first, Here is what I want to Master.

1. Myself (Body, Mind, Emotions)

2. Coaching (Allowing others to reach their fullest potential)

3. Artistic Expression (work through my stumbling blocks through art)

Items to do Every Day (Non-negotiable):

1. Drink 24oz. of water every morning. (Body)
2. Study Body, Mind, Mastery by Dan Millman for 45 Mins. (Mind/Coaching)
3. Exercise for an hour (Body)
4. Work on Art Pieces for a minimum of 1 hour. (Artistic Expression)

Limits I want to put on myself (Non-negotiable):

1. Only 30 mins at a time at the computer.  A minimum of a 15 minute break until I can use the computer again.

Alright, so I have 5 things that I want to do Every Day for the next 30 Days.  It's currently Oct. 2nd. and 30 days from now will be Sept. 1st.  I will be checking in periodically to let you know my progress, what I'm learning, and I'll share some of the art I've been working on.

Make it a great day!

Putting Thoughts into Action

Hello all,


So it's been a while since I posted.  There has been a lot of Philosophizing and not a lot of Action. I am writing this in order to keep myself accountable for putting the philosophy I have been reading into action.  Balance is now needed at this point in the cycle and it's time to Envision a solution to adding practicality to all of the philosophy that has been studied.


My Goal: Focus on creating non-negotiable habits for a minimum of 30 day periods.


My Inspiration: Masters of their fields before me.


My Hope: It provides a journal of change to inspire others as well as a means to keep myself accountable.


My Desire: To live the truth that I Create for myself.  Be the person I would like to be.


In this series of posts I'll be checking in to keep you updated on my projects and progress.


Let's see what happens!

Beyond the Game (Hockey and Life)

So it's been a while since the 2010-11 Stanley Cup Final between the Boston Bruins and the Vancouver Canucks but yesterday I was reminded what an impact that had on hockey fans and people around the world....and perhaps in a very different way than you might expect...

I arrived at the local rink early yesterday to cut some sticks for a training ladder and prepare for running that nights practice when one of the kids in our youth organization found me.  He had arrived early and sounded nervous but eager to talk with me because "people your age don't usually hang out with kids like me."  It was flattering and we were very early so I thought it would be fun to play some bubble hockey with him.  He was excited and was also better at bubble hockey than I would have imagined.  Sure, I'm 26 and in my prime but he's a well tuned kid with some good hours of bubble hockey experience and it showed in his 3-1 thrashing he handed to me.  After finishing the game we sat down and talked some school and hockey.  I found out that Detroit was one of his favorite teams and that Vancouver used to be one of his favorites until this year.  When asked why he replied "I liked them until the riots after the final."

Now this may not have struck such a chord if it wasn't for the fact that it reminded me of a similar incident that happened while I was in Canada this Summer at the Andrews Hockey Growth Programs in PEI.  Wally Kozak, a great coach and motivator, was giving a talk to the kids at the Andrews Hockey Showcase and asked them what they remembered the most about the Stanley Cup Finals this year.  The kids in this group were about 8-11 and the first kid raised his hand and said "the riots."  The second kid said "some of the goals" and then another kid piped in and said "yea, the riots were awful."  To both Wally and my surprise this younger group keyed right into the major social problem that stemmed from the Stanley Cup more than anything else. 

With subsequent groups that all became older and older, when asked the same question, they focused on more of the hockey and less on the riots.  It was an interesting observation and one that Wally used to be able to spread some light on the things that matter most.  The values and life lessons.  In discussing these things further I found myself becoming more inspired to focus on the deeper lessons in sports.  I'm even attending a life coach certification in January to become even more well rounded and aware of the ways to help people develop their potentials and see the connections between sport and life.

The Vancouver Riots are a great talking point and opportunity to teach a lesson that can help people realize that deep connection between our character on and off the rink.  A way to learn how to not just do what others are doing because other people are doing it.  A way to learn that we have the choice to do what is right and not be a part of a "riot."  

Let's go back to my little hockey friend at the rink yesterday.  I feel very lucky and thankful to have had that opportunity to teach.  Earlier, he had been telling me how his teacher threatened to send him to the principle that day because he was feeling hyper and decided to sing songs during class like yankee doodle dandy.  After he had made the riot comment I used this as an opportunity to tease out some of the ideas of how people can act.  I asked him how he thought the riot started?  He wasn't sure, but it was "probably because some people were mad."  I agreed and told him about the snowball effect and how things can become quite out of control if someone doesn't say anything and let's some out of control behavior go.  I asked him what would happen if the teacher let you sing during their lesson and then other people started to sing and then everyone was singing and doing whatever they wanted.  We agreed it would probably get pretty crazy and out of control.  Finally, we talked about how we can be a leader and that we have a choice to do what feel and think is right or to do what other people are doing.

A great chance to allow a child to follow his heart and make good decisions....I love my job.  

How Do I Find Flow and Stay Present?

Ah Men's league hockey. A place to get some exercise, play a sport I love, and have some camaraderie with the guys. It's a place where I personally enjoy learning more about the game and now that I've gotten to a point where the challenge is reasonably low for me I've started to find new ways to develop myself. Learning to stay more in the present has been an underlying focus for myself in recent times and this past week has presented two interesting challenges:

1. Allowing myself to stay mentally present despite a physical pain.
2. Paying attention to my arousal level in order to find Flow

While these two challenges may appear much different on initial appearance they both deal with the staying present and performing despite adversity.

The story starts when I hit the gym for the first time in a number of years and weight lifted in order to get stronger. It was a Tuesday it was a leg day. My gym partner, Josh, taught me a great lesson about squating that made me realize the great importance of a good physical trainer*. Immediately after the workout they felt strong, limber, ready to go. However, as night came I knew I would be in some trouble.

The next day was a running day for Josh and I was very very sore. Deciding to go on the run demolished what little left I had of my legs and the rest of the day and following days made me realize that it would be nice to have a handle on the wall to help me sit down on the toilet. Felt like an old man. My legs were toast (aka. annihilated, dead, hurtin').

Hockey still had to be played though and that night it was with a group that allowed me to be a step slower as play was more laid back. The lack of knee bend slowed me down. It slowed me to the point that one of the guys who was in his high 70's (and yes 70's and still plays better than most) gave me a run for my money. No wheels. With my speed stymied I had to rely on my hands. The times that I tried to get lower for speed I found my legs giving out. It had been a while since I lacked my range of motion and at that time I further understood the importance of staying fit. Mentally, I was struggling. My mind was screaming at me to just hit cruise control on a snails pace and I fought to not let the inner negative voice take over. I changed out thoughts of doubts into positive thoughts of encouragement. It was not an easy task and I felt good for being able to quiet my mind and not get too wrapped up in a pain fixation.

By Friday my legs had still not recovered. They could hold weight though, which was a great step in the right direction. However, I found that Friday posed a whole new set of challenges. My physical body was uncoordinated, it lacked the fine motor coordination to move where I wanted when I wanted. It was another fight, this time me against my body control, or lack thereof. The night was spent trying to regain coordination but it resulted in losing the proper focuses needed to play hockey. I found myself making poor decisions as my awareness of those around me on the ice deteriorated. Thankfully I'm finding a whole new set of things to work on. The whole night was a struggle and in the end my progress to stay in the present felt minimal as my body would not cooperate out of fatigue.

Sunday night comes. It's my personal men's league game and my legs have recovered. Arriving at the rink early I found another team missing some players so I hop on for the game before mine. They had 1 sub and I knew that I would be staying on the ice for the full 60 minutes but said "why not?" The drop of the first puck was won right back to me where I tried to make a pass up to my wing; intercepted. I backed up using some crossovers and gave away where my momentum was going and they broke right in to have a nice shot opportunity. Later that shift a pass came from my defensive partner and I fumbled it, collected it, and tried to make a futile move on a rushing forward. Really frustrated with myself I asked "what the **** is going on." My mind wasn't in it, my body wasn't in it, what can I do?

That's when I remember a conversation I had with my friend, another Josh, who is attending school for sports psychology at Ithica, about staying present and getting myself to be in "Flow" (aka. in the zone). We discussed the power of being present during play and ways of managing arousal levels. At this point I had the realization that it was boredom that was occuring and that I was at the low end of the arousal spectrum. In order to snap myself out of it I gave myself some specific task goals. I said, "hey Steve, I'm going to score one right now" and not 30 seconds later I read the play well and intercepted the pass through the middle, picked my spot and ripped it home. Skating back to the center ice for the drop of the puck Steve looks at me and says with a smile "guess that's the power of intention, right?" I just laughed knowing how true his statement was.

From that point on I played with intention. Playing with the right focuses let me stay in the moment and play at a high level. After winning my own game 3-2 with the second and third goals coming from a great desire to score, the goalie from the other team said that I looked very focused and that he could tell I was in the zone.

Being able to find the best spot between boredom and anxiety is what allowed me to get into flow and something that I will need to continue to be aware of as I play and grow.

Ways I was able to be in "Flow" and stay present:

1. Recognition of what state I was in. (Bored, In Flow or Anxious)

2. Assessing which techniques to use. Such as Self-Instructional Talk(task focusing), Cognitive Restructuring(negative thoughts out, positive thoughts in) or Relaxation Training(didn't need to use this week but would be for calming down when too pressured. See post script)

3. Using these techniques to keep in Flow and Present.

Hope this blog post gives you some ideas and if you have any questions post them in the comments section and Go Bruins!

P.S. - Watching the Bruins at the start of Game 2 against Philadephia this year(2011) I noticed that the annoucers made the great comment about the Bruins needing to "slow things down and start making their passes." The flyers came out....flying....and the speed and pressure made Boston cough up the puck and make poor decisions and plays. By trying to relax and slow things down they were able to start making their passes again and found their stride to gain the win. Atta boys.

*Getting my weight more on my heels while doing squats and leg presses forces the proper muscles in my legs to work. I had been using my quads and adding to a more imbalanced strength system in my body by being so much on my toes. Probably a contributing factor to a sciatic nerve problem that I developed and has since passed.

Why is it good to have lofty goals? Our search for meaning.

A great video clip of a Viktor Frankl discussing how we need to shoot high in order to reach our goals. I'll be reading his book 'Man's Search For Meaning' very soon.

What leads to kids future success?

During typical conversations, I'm that guy who likes to bring up the psychology studies I read about in school. One of these studies came up the other week when discussing predictors of "success" with someone. Now, what success is...that's a whole other topic...but, for now let's use some general generic concepts of what success is (such as higher intelligence, better relationships, happiness, etc.). "The Marshmallow Experiment" by Walter Mishel at Stanford was a study testing to see if there were any correlations between kids who could wait for a greater reward and tests of success when they became older.

This compelling experiment had four year old kids sit in a room with one marshmallow and they were told that if they waited for the teacher/administrator to return then they would get TWO marshmallows. Pretty sweet deal, huh? Well, despite the prospect of having two marshmallows, it was found that only approx. one out of three would not eat the marshmallow, while two out of three wouldn't wait and gobble it right up.

The most interesting stuff became apparent when these kids were re-examined 14 years later. The kids who didn't eat the marshmallow were found as being happier, had higher grades and SAT test scores, had better co-operative relationships, and were more confident on the whole. On the other hand, the children who didn't wait to eat the marshmallow were found to be more moody, indecisive, and envious.

Some psychologists believe that it was the ability to delay gratification that was the most important factor. Dr. Philip Zimbardo went on to describe the difference between 'present' and 'future' oriented people and has repeated this study with similar findings. With people who are more in the 'present' being people who are more interested in the present moment while 'future' oriented people tend to be more "successful." He's even written books on how you can learn the principles of becoming more future oriented; irregardless of being a child or adult.

Other psychologists think that it's the ability to have self-control and self-discipline that's the main factor in the results. Psychologist Joachim de Posada also replicated this experiment in Columbia and the following video is his explanation of the findings. **Warning** If you have a soft spot for cute and funny things then you will enjoy the reactions of the kids in the following two videos.



Here is another video showing some more kids taking the test.



If you want to have fun with your 4 year old, try this one out, put a marshmallow in front of them, tell them the scenario, and then leave for 15 minutes. Make sure to have a video camera getting the reaction. (If they eat the marshmallow, don't fret, they aren't doomed to failure, they may just need to be taught a few key things about self-control and discipline.)

So this post is some food for thought about what can lead to certain indicators of success for your children later on in life.

What are your thoughts on this study and it's findings?? Please leave comments below.

The Benefits of Pond Hockey

So I got to lace my skates up with frozen hands last week as I had my first pond hockey game of the year. My hands rang with the familiar pain of trying to get my laces tight enough, as I watched the seven kids, ranging from High School down to squirts, who were out on the pond with me ready to play pond hockey. Stepping onto the ice I took a few strides and my foot found a hole where someone had drilled down through with an ice auger. A divot about two inches deep and 10 inches wide made me realize quickly, "oh man, I'm not in a rink anymore I better be aware of what I'm stepping on." Pieces of the surrounding cat tails blew across the ice every so often, patches of ice that had a thin layer that you could break through were spread out around the pond, cracks in the ice made the field of play feel like a hazard zone compared to the nice smoothed out ice I had started to get used to teaching at the local rink. Not having anything on for equipment except my gloves and helmet was a reminder to myself that I need to stay balanced and be aware of what I'm doing. Despite these treacheries I had an absolute blast.

There was no blowing of a whistle to start the game, only a throwing of the sticks from one side or the other to break up teams. Not having the game count for anything I was able to be more creative with the puck and with how I defended. I used my feet to purposefully block passes, pretending that I wasn't paying attention to where the next pass was going only to snap my stick in the passing lane at the last second, I worked on how to be deceptive with my stick-handling and I was able to try these techniques with no major consequence if they didn't work. Freedom is the closest word I could use to describe that feeling.

Beyond the feelings of freedom that I was having, the feeling of relaxation began to sink in. Being able to be on-ice and not have a guy breathing down my neck trying to do everything in his nature to take the puck away gave me a greater control with the puck. I could pull moves off consistently that in a pressured state would have made me lose my control. Having learned sport psychology I'm now realizing first hand what it's like to be able to feel my ideal performance level "my zone". There was very little to no anxiety, I was able to really relax with the puck and Man, does that feel great.

As we continued to play, the sun started to go down and slowly the colors of sky transformed against the backdrop of the trees. I couldn't help but take out my phone and try to play with one hand as I took some snapshots of the scene. As I was posting them on facebook I proceeded to score a goal one-handed and couldn't help but smile and laugh.

Here's the pic I snapped on the pond.

Shouts of my teammates yelling for passes and learning how to get open as I was doing my dangles were of regular occurrence. Getting their head up looking for passes to me and each other was a must. Sometimes a little excessively I was hearing my name called....ahem..but I'd rather hear someone yelling for a pass so I know where they are than someone staying quiet and as the game went on they calls for passes were at better times.

After about an hour and a half, some of the parents were coming back to check in to make sure we weren't freezing. Funny thing was that most of us were plenty warm if not sweating. No doubt, we burned some calories in the process and I'd personally rather be on a pond then on a treadmill any day.

To recap, here are some of the things I think are benefits of pond hockey:

-Tough Ice conditions make sure that you need good balance and awareness of the ice.

-Without equipment you need to play a different, much more skill oriented game.

-Without excessive pressure, relaxation and creativity can arise.

-You can learn things about the game you might not have realized otherwise.

-No expectations

-The beautiful surroundings

-A place for good teamwork and communication building.

-Can make new friends and deepen your current relationships.

-Can be a good workout.

-It can be straight up fun.


Over the last year I've fallen back in love with the game of hockey. My passion has grown again and I find myself watching the top players looking for nuances in their balance and positioning. Teaching stick-handling has forced me to study the art of puck handling much more in-depth then when I was a kid playing. Figuring out the small nuances, making the connections and learning how to feel the puck again has been exciting. My stick-handling is better than it's ever been and I feel more in control than I have ever felt before. If you're interested in finding more control with the puck join me on Wednesdays at Maine Sport, 5pm for Mites and Squirts or 530 for Peewee through Adults. From 3-5PM there will be Pond Hockey on the Maine Sport pond if the conditions allow and it's a great place to practice new moves. You can also join our Facebook group, just type in "Midcoast Pond Hockey" and ask to join. You'll get updates on times and places other people are playing.


On a final note, we're going to have a movie night that plays an ode to Pond Hockey. Below is a trailer for the movie "Pond Hockey" and we'll be having a showing of this movie on Wednesday January 19th at 6:30PM at the MRC. Hope you can attend and I hope you fall in love with Pond Hockey too as much as I have.


“Up to a certain age, kids should be let out
to play pond hockey. Skate and be creative
with the puck.” - Wayne Gretzky




Tell me some of your favorite pond hockey memories or any comments you have about pond hockey in the comments section!!!

Barry Schwartz: Using our practical wisdom

Most everyday during my lunch break I watch a Ted Talk video. Being able to hear great inspiration on a daily basis fills me up and inspires me into greater action. The videos that really inspire me I'll start to post and would love to have discussions with you about them.


The video I posted today really inspires me to get even more involved in my local hockey community. Every day I see the support of people who want the best for their kids. As relationships build with the parents and kids, I'm starting to see where a structure of practical wisdom could be used and helpful. I watch the younger kids look up to the older kids with stars in their eyes and excitement of future potential. Being able to incorporate the idea of mentoring and building of relationships is something I want to incorporate as we grow as a hockey community. Building a system where the older students are being able to mentor the younger students could be a great thing and something worth thinking and developing further.


To explore one of Barry Schwartz points more in depth, I want to look at one of his points he makes at the end.

"What makes people happy? (according to the latest psychological studies).....Love and Work.

Love - managing, successfully, the relations with the people that are close to you and the communities of which you are a part.

and

Work - engaging in activities that are meaningful and satisfying (fulfilling)" -Barry Schwartz


What are your thoughts on this statement? Does this ring true for you? Feel free to share some of your ideas and thoughts from this video and how it relates to your life I'd love to hear them.

Hockey Program Updates

Hope everyone is having a wonderful holiday season! Santa was nice to me and got me a new visor and stick! Just wanted to give some updates as to pond hockey and other events that are happening.

If you're in the Midcoast Maine area, Midcoast Pond Hockey has it's own Facebook Group!!! This group will be used to post times, ponds, and people to play. It will be used as a medium to gather people together who are interested in playing the game of hockey in its most natural condition. Please be safe out there and make sure that you use the proper equipment suited to your ability. Follow this link to join the group! http://www.facebook.com/home.php?sk=group_143608449025834

Off-Ice Stick-handling clinics Every Wednesday at Maine Sport Sessions are $10 and 4 days of participation will get you a free Smart Hockey stick-handling ball!! These are 30 minute sessions that are divided into the following groups:

Mites and Squirts : 5pm
Peewee-Adult : 5:30pm

Private and Group Lessons are available for everything from Skating and Stick-Handling to Goal Setting and Leadership. If interested call or email me at 207-991-0244 or Jesse@envisionbalance.com

Anyone interested in Light-Weight High-Performance Socks can also get in contact with Jesse.

If you have a request for a topic that you'd like to see covered more in depth on the Envision Balance Blog just let me know! Post your ideas in the comments section below.

If you haven't had a chance to check out the new HBO series 24/7 Road to the Winter Classic, it's worth a look! A great dive into the behind the scenes of the NHL and some of the greatest players. http://www.hbo.com/sports/24-7-penguins-capitals-road-to-the-nhl-winter-classic/index.html Not sure how long this link will work but you can find the episodes on Youtube as well but in a lower quality format.

Finally, Andrew's Hockey has released their dates for the 2011 summer season and they are accepting registrations. You can check them out on www.hockeygrowth.com and Hope to see you up in beautiful Prince Edward Island this summer!

All the Best,

-Jesse

Hello everyone,

As a follow up to my last post on dealing with failure. This article takes the progression a step further. Once you've dealt with failure or if you haven't reached your peak performance level of confidence and want to feel better about yourself and your skills. The following article, also from wikihow is a great place to start thinking about how you can gain or bolster self-confidence. Below, I've put some questions and food for thought in some of the upcoming posts.

How to Build Self Confidence

from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can Edit


You want to be confident and feel confident, but what if you're starting with little or no confidence? How do you get from Point A to Point B? True self-confidence isn't an overnight acquisition. It takes dedication to realize you are a good human being that is worthy of respect and love.

Steps

1. Recognize your insecurities. What does that voice in the back of your mind say? What makes you ashamed of yourself? This could be anything from acne, to regrets, or friends at school. Whatever is making you feel unworthy, ashamed, or inferior, identify it, give it a name, and write it down. You can also tear these written pieces to start feeling positive on those points.
   
2. Talk about it with friends and loved ones. Wear it on your sleeve. Each day you should chip away at it; wear it down. There's no quick fix. Get to the root of the problem; focus on it and understand that you need to resolve each issue before you can move on. And that doesn't mean you have to get rid of whatever makes you feel bad (many times, you simply can't). You need to learn to accept yourself, your past, your circumstances as they are, without necessarily thinking of them as "bad".
   
3. Remember that no one is perfect. Even the most confident people have insecurities. At some point in any of our lives, we may feel we lack something. That is reality. Learn that life is full of bumps down the road.
   
4. Identify your successes. Everyone is good at something, so discover the things at which you excel, then focus on your talents. Give yourself permission to take pride in them. Give yourself credit for your successes. Inferiority is a state of mind in which you've declared yourself a victim. Do not allow yourself to be victimized. Express yourself, whether it's through art, music, writing, etc. Find something you enjoy. Everyone is born with talents and strengths. You can develop and excel in yours. If it's difficult to name two or three things you have some ability in or just plain love to do, think about things others do that you would like to do too and take some lessons or join an enthusiasts club. When you're following your passion, not only will it have a therapeutic effect, but you'll feel unique and accomplished, all of which can help build your self confidence. Plus, adding a variety of interests to your life will not only make you more confident, but it will increase your chances of meeting compatible friends!
   
5. Be thankful for what you have. A lot of the times, at the root of insecurity and lack of confidence is a feeling of not having enough of something, whether it's emotional validation, good luck, money, etc. By acknowledging and appreciating what you do have, you can combat the feeling of being incomplete and unsatisfied. Finding that inner peace will do wonders for your confidence.
   
6. Be Positive, even if you don't feel the same way. Avoid self-pity, or the pity and sympathy of others. Never allow others to make you feel inferior--they can only do so if you let them. If you continue to loathe and belittle yourself, others are going to do and believe likewise. Instead, speak positively about yourself, about your future, and about your progress. Do not be afraid to project your strengths and qualities to others. By doing so, you reinforce those ideas in your mind and encourage your growth in a positive direction.
   
7. Accept compliments gracefully. Don't roll your eyes and say, "Yeah, right," or shrug it off. Take it to heart and respond positively ("Thank you" and a smile works well).
   
8. Look in the mirror and smile. Studies surrounding what's called the "facial feedback theory" suggest that the expressions on your face can actually encourage your brain to register certain emotions. So by looking in the mirror and smiling every day, you might feel happier with yourself and more confident in the long run.
   
9. Fake it. Along the same lines of smiling to make yourself feel happy, acting confident might actually make you believe it. Pretend you're a completely confident version of you; go through the motions and see how you feel!
   
10. Stick to your principles. It might be tough, but if you don't have something you can believe in, you don't have anything. If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything. No matter what's happened in your life, you can always lay claim to the fact that from this day forward, you've followed your principles to the best of your ability.
    
11. Help others. When you know you're kind to the people around you, and are making a positive difference in other people's lives (even if it's just being kinder to the person who serves you coffee in the morning), you'll know that you are a positive force in the world--which will boost your self confidence. Just recognizing who or what you're like inside will help you become that on the outside. Exercise helps you build strength and confidence, increases libido, and has many other positive effects.
    
12. Always keep a smile on your face, that will build a lot of self-confidence
    
13. Share your knowledge & your experience with others
    

Video

Tips

• Exercise and eat healthy. Exercise raises endorphins and makes one feel happier and healthier. It is certainly an easy and effective way to boost your self-confidence.
  
• When you are feeling terribly insecure, write down your positive traits and read them back. This feedback would give you surprising results.
  
• Do not be afraid to push yourself beyond your physical or mental limits. Such a pressure would help you see how easily things can be achieved and thereby helps you hone skills. Step out of your comfort zone.
  
• Condition yourself to talk positively about yourself. Every time your mind wanders and say you are not apt at it, pause for a minute, undo those negative vibes and say you can do it. At least you should make an attempt to accomplish that daunting task. With that, you will learn more about yourself.
  
• Avoid perfectionism. Perfectionism paralyzes you and keeps you from accomplishing your goals.
  
• You can provide yourself with an extra dose of confidence by using the Best Me Technique of self-hypnosis to pre-experience the rewards of a long-term goal, thereby reducing the stress.
  
• Have a good group of friends that will support you in any decision making
  
• Look forward to what lies ahead in the day or the future: try not to express any bad feelings in any way.
  
• Most people lack self confidence because they worry how others view them. The first thing you have to do is be happy with yourself and your abilities. Focus less on how others see you because you only get back what you dish out. If they see you're self assured your self confidence will rub off on them.
  
• If you are religious in any way, pray about your insecurities. Pray that you will overcome these feelings and that you will be thankful for what you have.
  
• Write a list of the good things about you and the bad things. You should end up with loads of good things and only a few bad things. This will give a huge boost to your self-confidence
  
• Be contented.
  

Warnings

• Do not get wrapped up in your mistakes and dwell on bad points. They could turn out to be a healthy juxtapose to your good points or even give you something to improve. There is no feeling like being good at something you were really bad at.
  
• Do not mistake being loud for confidence. Some loud people cover their insecurities. If you are happy with yourself, you are confident.
  
• Don't rush yourself; take your time and seek the pace that is most comfortable for you.
  

Article provided by wikiHow, a wiki how-to manual. Please edit this article and find author credits at the original wikiHow article on How to Build Self Confidence. All content on wikiHow can be shared under a Creative Commons license.

Back to Envision Balance

In doing my research on the connections between task specific confidence and self-esteem in hockey, there was a correlation between how children felt about themselves and what they rated themselves in confidence. Look forward to future posts where we'll be exploring the connection between self-esteem and it's effects in sport.

FOOD FOR THOUGHT : What are some things that have boosted self-confidence for you personally? At what point do you think self-confidence can be a bad thing? Do you think self-confidence can be a bad thing?

Learning and/or Teaching how to Deal with Failure

My wise father sent me a link that I thought was definitely worth sharing with you. The article holds some key steps in dealing with failure and takes a well-rounded approach to how you can help someone deal with failure. If you're dealing with failure right now and haven't had the guidance as to what to do then reading through the steps and try to learn from their wisdom will be greatly beneficial.

How to Offer Encouragement to Someone Who Has Failed an Exam or Test - wikiHow
How to Offer Encouragement to Someone Who Has Failed an Exam or Test - wikiHow

Grounding, Perseverance, Positivity, Sensitivity, Understanding, Encouragement, Commitment and Envisioning were the major values for me in this article. Reminding myself as a teacher and relating these values to the success I've seen in my own life is what I feel like I can personally take from the article.

Does this article inspire or enlighten you in any way? What did you take from the article? How do you see this happening in your own life?

I'd love to hear how you relate to these things personally, feel free to leave your comments below.

Reaching Success With John Wooden

In the search to become a better instructor, teacher, human...a talk with John Wooden really grabbed a hold of me. The wisdom rolled off his tongue so quickly that I had to keep stopping and going back to listen to the waterfall of knowledge that was spilling out from his mouth. Like a musician trying to learn a new song I was writing down each of the sentences that grabbed a hold of me and resonated with me. These are some of the phrases that I noted starting with John's definition of Success.

Success - "Peace of mind, attained only through self-satisfaction and knowing that you made the effort to do the best of which you're capable." - J.W.

"Never try to be better than someone else, always learn from others, and never cease trying to be the best that you can be. That's under your control, if you get too engrossed, involved, or preoccupied with the things that you have no control, it will adversely effect the things over which you have control." J.W.

"If you make the effort to do the best that you can do of with which you're capable and trying to improve the situation that exists for you, then I don't think that other people can judge that. It's a lot like reputation. Reputation is what other people perceive you to be. It's your character that is what you really are." - J.W.

"Character is much more important then what you are perceived to be. You'd hope that they'd both be good but doesn't always happen that way." - J.W.

"No written word, no spoken plea, can teach our youth what they should be. Nor all the books on all the shelves. It's what the teachers are themselves." (Use this in a teaching guide)

"Education first, basketball second, little precedence for social activities cause otherwise if you let the social become more important than the other two then you'll not have any for very long." -J.W.

3 Rules for his teams
1. Never be late.
2. Had to be neat and clean, no profanity.
3. Never criticize your teammate.

We must Believe that things will work out as they should providing that we do what we should. Often times we don't do the things that are necessary to make those things become a reality.

According to Coach John Wooden, this poem was written by George Moriarty, a former major baseball umpire.

Sometimes I think the fates must grin as we denounce them and insist,
The only reason we can’t win is the fates themselves have missed.
Yet, there lives on the ancient claim - we win or lose within ourselves,
The shining trophies on our shelves can never win tomorrow’s game.

So you and I know deeper down there is a chance to win the crown,
But when we fail to give our best, we simply haven’t met the test
Of giving all and saving none until the game is really won.
Of showing what is meant by grit, of fighting on when others quit,

Of playing through not letting up, it’s bearing down that wins the cup.
Of taking it and taking more until we gain the winning score,
Of dreaming there’s a goal ahead, of hoping when our dreams are dead,
Of praying when our hopes have fled. Yet, losing, not afraid to fall,

If bravely we have given all, for who can ask more of a man
than giving all, it seems to me, is not so far from - Victory.
And so the fates are seldom wrong, no matter how they twist and wind,

It’s you and I who make our fates, we open up or close the gates,
On the Road Ahead or the Road Behind.


Another set of 3's
Don't Whine, Don't Complain, Don't make excuses...just do it the best to your ability cause nobody can ask more than that.

You can lose when you outscored somebody in a game and you can win when you're outscored.

As a player..."When you see somebody and they didn't know the outcome I hope that they can't tell by your actions whether you lost or won."

"If you make the effort to do the best you can, regularly, then the results will be about what they should be. Not necessarily what you'd want them to be but they'll be about what they should. Only you will be able to know if you can do that. Score is the biproduct of the other things, not an end within itself." -J.W.

The journey is better than the end.

Assume that a rebound is coming off every time.

http://tobefree.files.wordpress.com/2010/06/pyramid_lg.jpg

These are principles that worked for John and mostly deal with character development. It's a belief of mine that as people develop in their life they become a reflection of themselves in their playing. The connection between who they are on the ice and who they are off of the ice is too strong to ignore. The trick is finding the best ways to inspire, educate, relate, and connect with each other as we are coaching or playing.

What are your thoughts on some of John's words of wisdom? Do you feel like there is a link between personality and how people perform in sport? I love to hear feedback and I'll make sure to check and respond to your comments as they come.

A Knowledge Building Youtube Playlist

Hey Everyone,

I've been trying to get my website www.envisionbalance.com a little more updated, organized and more connected with the rest of the social media that I've been experiencing. This post is one of my personal development playlists that I created in youtube from some of my favorite talks I've seen over the past years. I'll try and update this more as I continue to find and refine content.



Hope everyone is having a great holiday season. If you're feeling stumped with what to get someone for a gift, check this one out, as I'd like to receive this one for a gift.... https://www.23andme.com/ They do genetic testing and test to see what kinds of diseases you're genetically predisposed to and much much more.

Happy Holidays,

-Jesse

Being An Outstanding Team Player

Hello again everyone and hope you're having a wonderful season. Today's post is about building team cohesiveness. There are too many times that I've watched very talented teams with talented individuals fall short because they weren't supporting each other well on and off the ice.

Being part of a team, whether it's hockey or elsewhere in life, can be challenging but knowing what is being expected from you by your teammates can help keep you moving in the right direction. Scouting Solutions teamed up with Andrews Hockey Growth Programs to provide a great resource for players and coaches to learn about all aspects of personal development. The Andrews philosophy is driven by "the understanding that successful development as a hockey player is the product of complete personal growth" and the Interactive Hockey Trainer is a great resource to know how to reach your peak performance.

After having asked permission they've been kind enough to include the following article from their Interactive Hockey Trainer to give some tips in how to become an Outstanding Team Player.:

10 Things I Want in a Teammate,
10 Things a Teammate Wants in Me

When players join a team, they often get instructions from a coach about what is expected of them, but, players rarely get a similar set of instructions from their teammates. However, learning what is expected from teammates can be a fairly simple process. All players need to do is list what they want from their teammates, and then work to give those things first.

Here is a common wish list for teammates:

1. Talks to me - Someone who is in a good mood and goes out of the way to say hello and talk to me.
2. Helps me - Someone who practices and learns about the game and then helps me learn too.
3. Gives me a chance - Someone who shares the play with me by passing.
4. Encourages me - Someone who always tells me to keep trying when something I do isn't working out.
5. Congratulates me - Someone who is the first person to congratulate me when I do something right.
6. Sticks up for me - Someone who I can count on when I'm challenged by someone on the other team.
7. Shows confidence - Someone who is positive about our abilities to win contests.
8. Never quits - Someone who always plays hard no matter the score.
9. Never pouts - Someone who is always upbeat even if something doesn't go the right way.
10. Never boasts - Someone who thanks other players for their help after scoring a goal.

Being a good teammate takes work and thought. Players who make the effort will see the reward long past their time on the team.

Thanks again Andrews Hockey (www.hockeygrowth.com) and Scouting Solutions (www.scoutingsolutions.com) for providing some great insight into being a solid team player!

Hockey Programs Lighting Up December!

With the holiday season upon us, Christmas lights aren't the only things that are going to be lighting up around the Midcoast area. Maine Sport and the Midcoast Recreation Center will be having their hockey programs going full swing supporting the kids and adults who are lighting up the nets with goals this year.

There are opportunities available every Wednesday for OFF-ICE STICKHANDLING clinics. These will be 30 minute sessions that will be divided into the following:

Mites : 5pm
Squirts : 5:30pm
Peewee-Adult : 6pm

The duration and skill levels are open to change in order to best balance the groups. Sessions will be $10 and 4 days of participation will get you a free Smart Hockey stick-handling ball.

Private and Group Lessons are available for everything from Skating and Stick-Handling to Goal Setting and Leadership. Please call or email Jesse at 207-991-0244 or Jesse@phantomwear.com

Anyone interested in Light-Weight High-Performance Socks can also get in contact with Jesse.

Stay tuned for Off-Ice Training Sessions and Pond Hockey Postings.

How we might look at talent in the future...

Daniel Coyle is the author of the new book The Talent Code. He provides insight into how top performing athletes differ in their brains to gain a competitive edge. He uses the latest findings in psychology to make his argument of just how people become excellent athletes outside of old ideas on natural talent and physical training. Online he has a blog that highlights his ideas and new findings which is a great read for anyone looking to learn more about fostering more talent in themselves and those around them. His book and blog is an excellent read for coaches and anyone in the athletic field who has an interest in getting the most out of their athletic performance. I've included the link below to an interesting article he has posted on how talent could be determined more by mindset than immediate physical skills in the future.

http://thetalentcode.com/2010/05/05/identifying-talent-what-really-matters/

Being able to make sure that your physical training is balanced by a strong mental training seems to be the way of the future when it comes to the next generation of athletes. Stay tuned for more information about how to stay balanced while pursuing your goals.

Simon Sinek: How great leaders inspire action

I've taken a little time away from updating the blog to learn and figure out my priorities. Essentially, to figure out why I'm doing what I'm doing. This question seems to be very prevalent in my life wherein I strive to understand why first and then let everything fall into place after. I've recently been getting in touch with finding my emotional center through yoga, introspection, and a wonderful young lady that has been much of the inspiration of my journey. Being able to find what moves me and how I deeply feel about things instead of a previous mode of breaking things down rationally has allowed me to get in touch with some of the things that matter most to myself. With these feelings in mind I have been starting to reinvent my approach to business and the way in which I operate because previously my methods were not as productive as the effort that I felt like I was putting in. In my search for finding my new approach I've been doing a lot of reading and watching of videos. Sadly, I've been forgetting that I now have a blog and that I can share this information with others. Realizing today that these things that have inspired me should be shared is my motivation for this post. I'll continue to update as I find more and more things that inspire me.